i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Betty ford says i'm here all night
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Randomize
