Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
True but thats because hes a fetus.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
