i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Randomize
