@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
