I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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