party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Randomize
