I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
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