i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize