Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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