I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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