Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Please, let me fuck your mom
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
