My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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