So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
She's the barista slut.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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