there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
