Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize