Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
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