imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
