Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Randomize
