I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Randomize
