I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Everclear isn't food dammit
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
