i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
