i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize