Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
