he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Randomize
