there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
