she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
