i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
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