I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize