eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
