Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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