Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Randomize
