Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize
