Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
