my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
