why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I don't think brook has ever known best
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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