a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize
