I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Randomize
