i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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