i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
