I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
