I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
