Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
