You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Still dying that you shit outside
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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