There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
