3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Randomize
