I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
