Non-Jews are for practice
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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