just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
either way he was missing a nipple.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Randomize
