And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
