And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
